In romantic relationships, love cannot do everything. And it is precisely about couple relationships that psychologist Dr. Mark Travers specializes. After studying hundreds of couples and analyzing his own marriage, he has concluded with 5 habits that are present in the strongest relationships. He has made a list of the 5 requirements that must be present in a couple’s weekend, with the aim of nurturing the bond and building a healthy relationship. First, he has observed that couples take time to laugh together. Bringing a smile to each other’s faces, using humor to break the tension, and engaging in silly games make them stronger.
Having simple rituals, like watching a series together, going to the movies on a certain weekend day, or doing sports together: activities that make them a team. Spending time together but separately. It’s not necessary to be making plans and communicating 24 hours a day; each one can carry out an activity while being in the same room. Not forgetting intimacy, prioritizing sex, even going so far as to plan it instead of waiting for the perfect moment that never comes.
To feel that they are present, without distractions, mobile phones or work. According to the professor, the way couples spend their time together during the weekend can make the difference between a strong and healthy relationship. All of it is intentional, making an effort to spend time together and nurture the bond because, as I have said before, love alone cannot solve everything.
Psychology of relationships
There are no magic formulas to sustain a romantic relationship forever. Each person has their own way of understanding love, relationships, and bonds, so communication is important to achieve satisfaction within the relationship. Although there is no manual for having the perfect relationship, psychology provides guidelines that can help. This is why Dr. Mark Travers, a psychologist specialized in relationships, argues that a couple’s happiness depends on their intentionality in spending quality time together on the weekend, when the chaotic rhythm of the week and work disappear.
5 habits of happy couples
Dr. Travers has studied the behavior of hundreds of couples, in addition to his own, to find the secret of happiness. From his study, he has concluded that the strongest and happiest couples share the following habits during their time together on weekends:
- They keep humor in mind. It’s not complicated and it’s very effective. Using humor to break the tension helps couples get closer emotionally. Jokes, dancing, games, whatever makes them laugh together.
- Having simple rituals. They don’t have to be fancy, expensive dinners. Just watching a series together, going out to do sports or eat. Structuring the weekend helps them feel less chaotic. This also helps them feel like a team, with a shared identity.
- Spending time together but separately. Dr. Travers calls it “parallel play.” It’s about each person engaging in an independent activity while sharing that physical space. One can read a book while the other paints, but both share the living room. It’s a way to recharge each person’s individuality while keeping each other company, reinforcing the bond.
- Don’t forget about intimacy. Apparently, the happiest couples prioritize sex, even scheduling it. What’s the point of waiting for the perfect moment that never comes? It’s a way to prevent routine and fatigue from winning the game.
- Be present. It is not necessary to have deep conversations all the time, but it is important to be present so that the time is of quality. Put away phones, emails, work, or any other distractions.
According to psychology and Dr. Travers, the intention to spend time together and to put these habits into practice is essential for a couple to function. Conversely, if the health of a relationship is left in the hands of connection, chemistry, and love alone, the chances of success are quite low.